It's May 17th, 143 days since Christmas 2013 and 222 days until Christmas 2014. A man named Irving Jones has been driving his neighbors crazy for the last 143 days by keeping his Christmas lights on display. "It's ridiculous. It's 90-something degrees out here and the old coot still has light up icicles hanging from his gutters. That Santa statue is dressed as if it's below freezing out here so he's probably having a heatstroke and the nativity scene has become a home for nesting birds," says Irving's neighbor, Albert Wilson. "I've reached the point where it's almost too late to take them down," says Irving, who claims his wife nagged him to unhang the lights so he left them up out of spite. "Now I can just tell people I'm getting an early start on next year and they'll think I'm just a sweet old man who's excited for the holidays. Truth is, the fat man doesn't bring me s#@& anymore so I hate Christmas." Irving's lights have gotten the neighbors, with the exception of Albert, excited to see his light show for the coming holiday season. "He must have something crazy planned for this year since he's getting such an early start. I can't wait to gossip to my friends about how high his electric bill must be and how it must drive his wife crazy," says Meredith Van Heusen, another of Irving's neighbors. Irving plans to disappoint by just leaving whatever he already has on display and adding nothing more. He has no plans to take any of the lights down that he already has up and will continue to annoy Albert and build anticipation for the rest of his neighbors.
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