McDonald's Resorts To Scare Tactics

, by Building Rubble

McDonald's is known for their calorie-laden foods and their giant golden arches. Recently, it seems that their sales have been decreasing due to everyone suddenly being concerned about what they shove into their faces. Their biggest sales losses have been in Happy Meals, McDonald's meals for children. In order to get more parents to buy Happy Meals for their children, McDonald's has come up with a Happy Meal mascot who is just plain terrifying. "It's just so scary! It acts so happy on the commercials, but I can't imagine what it would do to my child if I didn't buy a Happy Meal," says Janice Anders, a concerned mother. Using this scare tactic, McDonald's Happy Meal sales are expected to sky rocket on Friday when the horrifying little demon mascot is officially released. Parents are asked to buy their kids Happy Meals as often as possible to avoid whatever horrible fate waits for their children if they don't.

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